Friday, August 29, 2008

The Story of Woe*

Yesterday, in "As Costumechick's World Gyrates" we learned that the yarn ran out while Costumechick was knitting her Fluffy Blue Raspberry Mittens. (Duh DUh DUUUUH) What intrigue has happened since? We'll find out today on, "As Costumechick's World Gyrates!!"

(Insert commercial for random feminine product, or pharmaceutical)

Yes. I, Costumechick, did go to WEBS yesterday. On the way there, since Dee was driving, I knit on my mitten. I figured I'd knit until I ran out of yarn. I did, with about 3 miles to go before the exit. Wonderful planning, if I had been trying.

But, and there is always a but, I used every last thrum I had with me to get to this point. (facepalm) "No problem," I thought. I'll just cast on for my next project on my way home.

This is where I rummage around in the car for my pattern.
and rummage...
and rummage...
It is now starting to dawn on me that I don't have my magazine with me. I left the stupid thing at work. (grrrrr.) "It's ok," I think, "I'm going to the biggest yarn store ever! I'll just peek at a copy in the store, and see how much I need to cast on."

In the store we go. I got a bit distracted by the yarn fumes at this point, so my story has some holes. Things were picked up that I didn't go to the store for, and other things might have been placed in my basket. I may have made out with some cashmere/bison/silk blend in the bcak room - I can't be sure. What I am sure of is that I got my teal Lopi (yay!)

and that I did not find a copy of the Fall 2006 Vogue that has my pattern in it. (boo.) Woe and shit and Hell. Now what do I do? I have the yarn to work on the mittens but no stinking thrums, the yarn to work on a sweater, but no fucking pattern!
At this point I stumble about WEBS, a little heady from the lusty moment with the cashmere/bison/silk yarn, a little hungry, and a little aimless, seeing as I am project less in a giant yarn store. So I did what any self respecting knitter would do. I bought more yarn.

This is brown Berkshire by Valley Yarns. I am making DH a pair of mittens too. I had planned to make him a pair, but not until I had the other four pairs left on my list completed. But, my cuff needles were free, and I knew I could cast them on in the car, so his mittens of brownness got bumped up in the list.
Does the Story of Woe end there? Of course not. On the way back to the Haven, we got stuck in the Worst Traffic Ever. I managed to finish the entire cuff, even knitting slow. Then I was stuck in no-mans-land again. I bought a magazine at WEBS for just this purpose though, thankfully. I cannot handle traffic. I really can't handle it if I don't have something to do. I just get more and more rage-y. It is not a pretty site. That means, for those of you counting, I now have one pair of thumb less teal mittens, one of which is missing the top; one brown cuff of a mitten; and one skein of gorgeous purple alpaca that I can't cast on because I forgot my pattern; all sitting in my lap, staring at me. It was like being Sisyphus, with yarn instead of a rock.
Then, just for the cherry, on the icing, on the cake of the day, I forgot any sort of writing device, what so ever for SnB. (wow. I am random metaphor girl today.) No big deal in the grand scheme of things, but irritating none the less. Like sand in your swim suit.
But, I did get a decent amount into my sweater project:

This purpley alpaca goodness if for my Mom. My Mom is so tiny. I wish I could knit stuff this small for me. I could get a lot more done. Of course, it is on size 3 needles, so.... you'll be seeing a lot of purple Stockinette.
For a long time.
I'll do my best to make it interesting. Maybe the sweater pieces will go on adventures? Maybe I will see if I can come up with more challenges, a'la pencils and soup cans? Stay tuned till next time on "As Costumechick's World Gyrates".

*All right, fess up. I know some of you know what this literature reference I am lampooning. Then, after you fess up, I will know who is really dirty! :)


Batty said...

What an experience! The yarn fumes at WEBS get to my head too... that place is dangerous. I'm glad you found something to knit on the way home. Car time is knitting time, after all.

anne said...

Anonymous said...

Smart, Talented, Sexy and fing FUNNY; there is no wonder I married this stiching bitch

KnelleyBelley said...

Nothing to fess up. No clue.

I know something about cans of pineapple juice, though.

theatreknitter said...

I firmly believe that it has nothing to do with yarn fumes but rather that the yarn at webs is actually possessed and it therefore jumps into the basket. I could be exagerating, but I really believe it to be true.